gift exchange ideas and games#

The holiday season is rife with opportunities for creative gift exchange ideas. From the office Secret Santa to a White Elephant gift exchange among friends to a frenetic Christmas morning with the family, holiday gift giving doesn't have to feel like a never-ending to-do list.

We have games, ideas, and tips to make your gift giving even more fun this year. Let our team of elves—specifically entertaining and etiquette experts, as well as Real Simple readers—inspire you with innovative strategies to make any holiday gift exchange more memorable.

Gift Exchange Etiquette#

If you're the coordinator of a gift exchange, here's info to share with your invitees:

• Who's involved
• Price range for the gifts
• Any theme you've chosen—like requesting only gag gifts, baking tools, or books
• Who they're buying for and any preferences they have
• Rules about what to give—such as allergies or other issues among participants
• Whether to wrap the gifts or not
• When, where, and how the exchange will occur

Gift Exchange Games for Friends and Family#

Turning your annual gift exchange into a game makes a fun activity more fun, more memorable, and—even better—it makes the fun last longer. Put your game face on and organize one of these activities for your next gifting party.

Start a Rotating Gift Box#

Anna Baldwin, a reader from Arlee, Montana, rotates a gift box among her three best friends from college, all of whom live too far away to visit at Christmas. She fills a box with locally made, low-cost items—one for each friend—and a personal note, and mails it.

The first friend takes out her gift, puts in three of her own, adds to the note, and then ships everything on to the next. The box rotates like that until it has made the rounds of all the friends, ending up back with Anna, complete with personal notes from her pals and their gifts to her.

Introduce a Gag Gift#

Wrap up your most egregious or inexplicable Christmas present from last year (sad-eyed ceramic cat, anyone?) for an unsuspecting family member. It becomes that person's responsibility to pass it along, like a hot potato, the next year.

Have a Cobweb Party#

This wacky gift game was all the rage during the Victorian era. You essentially make it as hard as possible for your loved ones to find their gifts. To set this up:

• Designate one room for the party, and assign each player a yarn color.
• Tie one end of a spool of yarn to each gift—blue yarn to one player's gift, red yarn to another, and so on.
• Unwind the yarn as you zigzag across the room, trailing it under furniture, looping it around banisters and over curtain rods, and anywhere you can. You want to make it as difficult as possible for the gift recipient to follow his or her yarn through the "cobweb" of different colors to find the present.
• Hand each person his or her spool of yarn and let the mayhem ensue.

Gift Exchange Games for Work Colleagues#

While these games are great for livening up a gift exchange among co-workers, they're fun to play with family and friends, too.

When choosing a gift for a gift exchange, consider who's participating in the exchange: Is it your all-female book club or family members of a wide range of ages and backgrounds? For the latter, we recommend simple (and inexpensive) gifts that work for just about anyone—including people you don't know really well—such as a stylish planter, a fun game, or a lovely notebook.

Host a White Elephant Gift Exchange#

Also known as a Yankee Swap or Dirty Santa, a White Elephant gift exchange game's "stealing" aspect gives it an element of unpredictability. Here's how it works.

• Invite everyone to contribute a wrapped gift.
• Draw numbers out of a hat to see who gets to pick from the pile first.
• Player No. 1 chooses and unwraps a gift and then shows it to everyone.
• Player No. 2 then "steals" that present or picks and unwraps another one from the pile.
• Player No. 3 can then steal either gift, or choose and unwrap another, and so on.

Any player whose gift is stolen gets to pick again. The game continues until everyone has a gift.

Here's a twist on a Yankee swap, suggested by Real Simple reader Christine Gritmon of Pearl River, New York, who sneaks decoy gifts into the mix.

Christine Gritmon of Pearl River, New York#

"They look like normal presents from the outside, but once you look inside, you see that the original item has been replaced with a note card bearing an instruction, such as 'Switch gifts with a person of the opposite gender' or 'Choose a new gift—and no one can take it from you.' This little twist was a surprise to everyone the first year, but now it is our favorite part of the ritual."

—Christine Gritmon of Pearl River, New York

Play Holiday Trivia#

Can you name all nine of Santa's reindeer? If so, you get first pick of the presents in the pile. Players can use clickers or simply raise their hands to answer. If correct, they get a present and leave the competition. At the end, the moderator opts to take the last gift remaining or steal a gift from somebody else: a one-time-only privilege for their hard work.

Gift Exchange Games for Kids#

Generally, kids don't need any help to make gift giving fun, but as party hosts, sometimes we need a few tricks for organizing and drawing out an activity that can otherwise quickly devolve into chaos. Here are a few ideas.

Try a Trinket Hunt#

Save a few stocking-stuffer gifts—small and inexpensive—to wrap and then hide around the house. After the kids finish with Santa's gifts, they go off and search for new trinkets, allowing adults to take a breather, get another cup of coffee, and gear up for unwrapping their presents under the tree.

Play a Word Game#

Either of these word games works for a kid-friendly gift exchange:

• Finish the Carol: Seat kids in a circle and have them pass each gift around to the tune of a holiday song. Designate someone to stop the song mid-verse. The person left holding the gift has to finish the line. If they succeed, they get the gift and sit out the rest of the game. If they don't, they remain in the game and the song continues. Repeat until all the gifts are gone.
• Word Guess: Tape a fill-in-the-blank holiday phrase on each gift and have children answer before unwrapping. For example, Not a creature was stirring, not even a _________.

Spin a Bottle#

Try a twist on spin-the-bottle to take turns opening gifts. With everyone seated around the room, give a bottle—or perhaps a large candy cane—a spin. Whoever it points to opens a gift or, if that child doesn't have any gifts left, designates another child to do the same.

Play Musical Chairs, Gift-Exchange Style#

This version of musical chairs makes gift-getting more exciting than just picking one from a pile, and it doesn't even require chairs. For this one, kids sit in a circle and pass wrapped gifts while Christmas music plays. When the music stops, the child holding the gift keeps it and leaves the game. The music continues with a new gift until each child has one.

Themed Gift Exchange Ideas#

A themed gift exchange helps gift givers by narrowing down the vast array of gifts to choose from to a more focused selection.

Host an Old Fashioned Cookie Exchange#

The granddaddy of themed gift exchanges is the cookie swap. This is where guests arrive with dozens of one kind of home-baked cookie and leave with a dozen each of a wide variety of homemade cookies. Double-down on the baking theme with an add-on gift exchange featuring aprons, cookbooks, or baking supplies.

Set Up an Ornament or Craft Exchange#

Entertaining expert Jeanne Benedict suggests making handmade ornaments out of 4-by-4-inch boxes that are light enough to hang on the tree. Inside the box, fashion a small kit of some kind, like a stamping kit, a jewelry-making kit, or a knitting kit: something fun that would be easy to pick up as a hobby. Each party guest should bring a kit to the party and then exchange it, so that everyone takes home a handcrafted ornament and gets a new project to start in the New Year.

Try a Pet Present Exchange#

Incorporate your furry friends into your holiday celebration. Gather fellow pet parents with their charges dressed in holiday garb—like a Santa hat, if they'll allow it—for a pet gift exchange. "Obviously you want to stay within the same species, either all cats or all dogs," Benedict says. Theme the presents toward the pets: bones and biscuits as gifts for for dogs and dog lovers, claw scratchers and catnip for cats.

Swap Cocktails#

Give the gift of holiday "spirits." Have each guest bring a gift bag with items needed to make a certain holiday cocktail—like coffee liqueur, orange cognac, and Irish Cream for a B-52—and then exchange the bags. For a different take, exchange red, white, or sparkling wines.

Gift Giving Ideas and Tips#

Use these strategies to make your gift giving experience simpler, less expensive, more charitable, and more fun!

Make Gift Giving Simpler#

If gift giving is stressing you out, you're doing it wrong. Try one of these ideas to make your gifting tasks easier.

• Make a gift of time together. In lieu of presents, consider renting a ski cabin for the weekend after Christmas or going on a beach escape together.
• Buy recurring gifts. Eliminate the guesswork and give the same gift every year. This way, you know what to give and the recipient looks forward to getting it. It might be an annual shipment of Florida citrus or Vermont cheese, a series of theater tickets, a museum membership, or a nice desk calendar. Smart gift card ideas can also work well here.
• Go in on a group gift. Pool funds from the family or friend group and gift someone something way more extravagant than you can do on your own. You and your siblings can all chip in to upgrade your parents' computer or TV—or help your niece or nephew score that guitar they've been eyeing.

Robin McClellan of Lehigh Acres, Florida#

"I ask gift recipients to send me a wish list that I buy from. It saves time, effort, and returns, yet still preserves an element of surprise,"

—Robin McClellan of Lehigh Acres, Florida

Make Gift Giving Less Costly#

Make your celebration more about the giving than the gift. Consider these ideas for a more budget-friendly holiday:

• Have a heartfelt conversation. Tell recipients up front you're going to cut back. "Don't make it a money issue with your kids, but talk about it in the context of what the holiday really means," says Sue Fox, founder of Etiquette Survival and author of Etiquette for Dummies. "This is the time to be with family, not for getting new skis."
• Be upfront. Tell friends and family of your leaner gift-giving philosophy early, and be direct. Say, "I'm paring down this year, so why don't we just exchange cards or go out to lunch?" You may find your giftees are actually relieved.
• Refrain from reciprocation. When someone unexpectedly gives you a gift, "By all means, say 'Thank you,'" says Peggy Post, coauthor of The Gift of Good Manners. "But other than being super-appreciative, you do not have to reciprocate."

Make Gift Giving Charitable#

Instead of targeting gift giving toward friends and family, pivot your gifting to the needy by implementing one of these ideas:

• Adopt another family for the holidays. Instead of buying gifts for one another, sponsor a needy family. If you have kids, talk to them about the difference the gesture can make to the other family and make sure they're okay with giving up presents. (You can always get them something little.) One way to give is through the Angel Tree program sponsored by your local Salvation Army branch, which provides a needy family's wish list to shop from.
• Put a charitable spin on Secret Santa. Benedict suggests adding a philanthropic twist to the game: Instead of giving material gifts, make a $20 donation to a charity your recipient would support. For instance, donate to the ASPCA in the name of an animal lover. It makes a more meaningful gift than another stocking stuffer.
• Swap toys with Santa. Along with cookies and milk, leave gently used or outgrown toys under the tree on Christmas Eve for Santa to "take back to the North Pole." You can subsequently donate those toys to an organization like Toys for Tots or Goodwill.
• Choose a gift that gives back. Many charities and businesses offer tangible gifts that put proceeds toward a good cause—so your gift recipient scores delicious coffee or funky socks, and you help support a favorite cause.

Make Gift Wrapping a Group Affair#

Gift opening is inherently fun, but gift wrapping can be a chore. Since presents are unlikely to wrap themselves, get the job done and have fun with one of these pre-Christmas party ideas:

• Host a wrapping party. Divvy up responsibility among guests for bringing supplies—ribbon, paper, decorative bags, bows, tags, scissors, and tape—and have them also bring their own unwrapped presents. Set out the supplies, cue the festive music, and have everyone work together to get the job done.
• Try a cookie swap packing party. Think of this as a holiday cookie exchange plus. Besides cookies to swap at the party, guests bring extras, along with metal tins, takeout containers, plastic boxes, and packing materials. Together, you carefully box up the extra cookies to ship to out-of-town family and friends. Alternatively, team up with an organization like Treat the Troops and ship those cookies (for free!) to U.S. military members serving abroad.

International Christmas Gift Traditions#

Americans aren't the only ones with gift-giving traditions. Here's what they do in other parts of the world.

Germany and Czech Republic#

German and Czech families hang an advent calendar on the wall four Sundays before Christmas Eve. Each day on the calendar has a little window, behind which tiny toys and pieces of chocolate are hidden. Children open a new window every day until Christmas, delighted by the unveiling of a new treat and the countdown to the big day.

The Netherlands#

Dutch children receive their gifts on December 5, St. Nicholas Eve, when families gather to play treasure hunt games and exchange riddles. Presents are anonymously signed "Sinterklaas," but a dedication is written on the wrapping paper to offer clues to the real gift-giver's identity.

A rhyming verse teases the recipient (in good humor, of course) or offers a hint at what's inside. Other small, unwrapped gifts are hidden in odd places—like inside a potato or a cup of pudding—the more surprising, the better.

Sweden#

Swedes used to practice a tradition called julklapp, which translates as "Christmas knocks." A gift-giver knocks on a friend or relative's door on Christmas Eve, quickly tosses a present inside the opened door, and then sprints away before the recipient has a chance to ID him. The mysterious packages were wrapped in many layers, one box inside another.

Sometimes the only thing inside the final box is a clue to the real gift's location. The more time the recipient spends on figuring out who gave the gift and where it was, the more successful the julklapp. Swedish children also believe in an alternative gift-giver to Santa Claus—the jultomten, a little gnome in a red cap who hides under the floorboards or in the attic until Christmas Eve, when he emerges to hand out gifts to the children.

Julklapp is an awful lot like the "booing" tradition of leaving candy and treats at neighbors' houses for Halloween—so why not make a new holiday tradition? Sneak candy or other treats to your neighbors, and call it "elfing."

Nova Scotia, Canada#

During the 12 days of Christmas—December 25 to January 6—masked jokesters called belsnicklers run around Nova Scotia neighborhoods ringing doorbells, making loud noises, and demanding treats. If the hosts correctly identify the masked strangers, the belsnicklers unmask themselves and ask the children of the home if they've been good. Upon hearing the inevitable answer of "Yes," they distribute candy to the children, like a reverse trick-or-treat.

Spain#

On January 5, Epiphany Eve, Spanish children set their shoes outside their home and fill them with straw, carrots, and barley for the camels of the Three Kings, who they believe pass through Spain on the way to Bethlehem. Overnight, the kings—not Santa Claus, who isn't widely celebrated in Spain—fill the children's shoes with gifts.

Italy#

Rather than Santa, Italian children believe in La Befana, an old witch who travels throughout Italy on a broom during Epiphany Eve. She doles out presents, candies, and fruit to the good children and bags of coal to the bad ones. A few weeks before her arrival, the children write wish lists with all the presents they want and then hide them in a chimney for La Befana to find.

Italians practice another gift-giving tradition called the Urn of Fate, where a tall urn is filled with wrapped presents—one for each family member. Each person takes turns picking until they find their rightful gift.

China#

The peak of gift-giving in China is the Chinese New Year, which they celebrate on the first day of the first month of the Chinese lunar calendar. (That's January 29 in 2025.) On New Year's Day, elders hand out special red envelopes called hong bao, filled with money, to the young people in their lives. The amount of money is always an even number, like 88, but never includes the number 4, which signifies bad luck.

Greece#

On January 1, Greeks bake a special cake or bread called vassilopita, which hides a foil-wrapped gold or silver coin. Whoever finds the coin in their piece of cake will be lucky for the next year. Put a modern gift-giving spin on the tradition by wrapping slips of paper inside foil. On each piece of paper write an IOU for a movie or a night out for pizza.